Patriotism is the New Religion in Uganda

Look at your present body to determine what you did in the past. Look at your present mind to determine what will come in the future. Shiddhartha Gautama

When China was in the throes of convulsions, great teachers emerged to its aid. Thus Kungfu Tzu (Confucius) coded elaborate ethics and methods of running governments. And Lao Tzu enacted moral codes for living in harmonious unity with nature.

In Uganda the Luwero war was the war to end all wars—human sacrifice and blood was to give birth to a new nation—for the gun having been demystified by willful carnage, the population would henceforth be unafraid of any devil that would emerge to lord over them. Moreover, the good of the nation would be foremost in the minds of the rulers and the ruled. The distortion in the power structure was corrected, so we were told.

All, however, did not turn up as planned for, as they say: Man plans, the gods decide. Uganda is not the shinning star on the mountain in a dark continent. Hence, the need for the new religion—Patriotism—to revive the fortunes of lost dreams.

Mr. Museveni, the fabricator extraordinaire, just completed a whirlwind budget busting tour of his fiefdom, preaching the gospel of Patriotism. In the North a prospective presidential candidate told teachers in his district to ignore Museveni’s call and just do their work. He has a point. What could be more patriotic than teachers concentrating on their job and avoiding distractions?
Another potential candidate, in a jujitsu-like reaction, began to preach his version of Patriotism to the youths of Nakawa. It seems that, if you are a prospective candidate and you never understood that Museveni has already thrown the gauntlet and has started the 2011 campaign in earnest, then you have lost ab initio.

I am not a candidate, but I will vote, and here is my version of Patriotism: Know thyself and control thy mind. From these come self-confidence, self-respect for yourself and others who make up the nation, the focus of Patriotism. So equipped, you will not take was is not yours without permission. So equipped, while horse-trading is a political reality, you will not blatantly and cynically buy MPs to enact laws for the benefit of you, the individual. So equipped, you will respect workers' resources and not muscle your way to obtain such resources to build your private enterprise. So equipped, you will be mindful of your priorities and maintain good roads and other public infrastructures. The list goes on and on. To know thyself and to respect thyself and others is to understand interdependence, impermanence and the emptiness of it all. Grasping and clinging to self in ignorance of reality, instead of embracing the whole, breeds lack of patriotism and its concomitant defective people and nation.

Next, Britain Will Donate Grasshoppers

The story that Britain is donating two lionesses to Uganda is unbelievable. It is a story that demonstrates the hopelessness of Africa at its core.

Lions and many other animals are native to Uganda, and would have been a critical cash cow. Where did the lions go? Poisoned by pastoralists, so says the Uganda Wildlife Authority (UWA). That is the shifty (Allan Tacca) explanation. A major part of the problem is lack of foresight and planning, which also shows up in bad roads and collapsing public infrastructures. Foreigners took, were given or stole a variety of animals just as they did humans. They went built zoos in their homelands. Now, why would middle-class Americans go to Africa to see animals when they can go to Florida and see the same animals? Which fool gives away his precious assets so that others can profit from while he starves?

Now that climate change is happening and the power that be sells away forests to “investors,” grasshoppers (cinene) may find nowhere to spawn. I understand part of the Baganda bride price includes cinene. We need to send an SOS to mother Britain. I am sure a foreign service Eton kid foresaw the day cinene would be of service in winning and influencing “friends,” and arranged for the breeding of imported cinene in Pax Britannia.

The Musevenian Kamya

Museveni came to power on the disaffections with Obote and the Northern hegemony—some real some imaginary. Other than the unnecessary losses of lives in the exercise, I have no tears for the Obote governments, nor that of his immediate successors. I owe them no favors.

The early Musvenian rhetorics—10-point program, sowing the mustard seed, building machines that build machines, the problem of Africa is leaders who overstay their shelf-lives, etc, etc—appealed to emotions. But emotions are often contaminated and lead down perilous paths to disappointments. A keen observer would have, however, soon detected the dualistic essence and anomalies and not been fooled. Other than the losers, all were out for a euphoric ride like children with candies, only to wake up shackled and gagged.


BK












WB

Fast forward to 2006. After Winnie Banyima abandoned us, her fans, Beti Kamya was the new heart-breaker gal on the block—brilliant and with the chic hairdo to boot! Check out the stylish headscarf of WB! BK like WB appealed to my intellect and emotions. Give me beautiful, fearless and brilliant women or give me death! I could not wait to read BK’s incisive articles. Then came the catfights with her party, FDC. I am a lover, and irrational cackling frightens the jibbers out of me! However couched, it was all about her ego. As we know, ego must get what ego wants, no matter what. It spoilt it all for me.

Ego is a mental construct. It has no inherent intrinsic existence. It is a deluded sense of self-grasping. It is the single source of a lot of miseries because it plays with our minds that it is a real solid phenomenon. Untamed, we all have it in various degrees, but it seems more prevalent and pronounced in the political classes because theirs plays out in the public arena. In the political realm ego sometimes projects as cleverness—the so-called political astuteness—when it is just plain old lying, cheating and back-stabbing.

Now, the question is: if Museveni is all about his ego at its grossest, and Kamya has displayed gross ego-centric behaviors with FDC, what is the difference between the two? The mantra of both is: my way or the high road—a chorus of confirmed egomaniacs. If both had tanks and guns to back their wishes and fantasies, the difference would be the same.

How Special is Buganda?

The statistical odds of many Ugandans reaching the age of 54 is not for the average Okello. And so it was an occasion of joy celebrating the birthday of the calm and level-headed King of Buganda whose ancestors were often erratic, if not mentally deranged. As characterizes many such occasions in Uganda, however, court jesters came out in full swing with such nonsense as: Buganda is special and must be so treated.

Buganda certainly has a crucial role to play in Uganda, just as much as Karamoja. When the clergy disrobes and gets right down being irrational, calling for a special Buganda, many Ugandans have a problem. We have been déjà vu down this path before, and it has not been pretty.

At the dawn of Independence the Mengo cabal wanted a special Buganda role—which effectively meant a special roles for themselves—even at the cost of disenfranchising the general population of Buganda. The Baganda effectively did not vote for the Independence government—an act that was patently corrupt, if not outright illegal. What would have happened had Baganda voted? Would their numerical advantage (which the NRM now salivates over) not been decisive and the history of Uganda been different?

We are in the era of democratic dispensation of free elections. However flawed the process has been, why is the Buganda population electing the ones who might be emasculating the “special Buganda?” Something is not jiving here.

Living in Cocoons

In Acoliland homes were (and still are) joined by pedestrian paths. So, going to the next village, school, hospital, or wherever, you would walk through the open compounds. That was the physical openness of Acoli life which might also explain the pervasive psychological construct. Contrast that to the Ugandan Indians who built walls around their shop-cum-homes. They would emerge to the store fronts to peddle their wears and retreat inside the walls at closing time. There they remained mysterious unto themselves. No wonder few black Ugandans had any empathy when Amin expelled them.

Now in Acoliland my brothas and sistas are building mansions enclosed in obscene tall walls. I am told one prominent Acoli politician is planning (or has already done so) to erect walls around his 500-acre farm. What is going on? Is it fear? Fear of what? My sista, my brotha, we just want to pass by and say: I rio maber? And also check on whether you still go to the toilet like the rest of us! There is no envy or covetousness. In fact, we celebrate with you on your success. No one wants the junks you have collected in the mansion. Might we ask whether this physical cocooning is also a manifestation of mental and heart cocooning which shows up in rigidity and fear of other points of views?

Looking is the Key

What is the sound of clapping one hand?
A Zen koan

Nasruddin, the Sufi was frantically looking for something under the street lamp. Some passersby asked him what he was looking for. He said that he was looking for the key to his house. The passersby joined him in looking, but soon tired, and one asked him where he actually lost the key. Nasruddin said he lost the key in the house!

Then there is the story of the Muslim who was put in jail for a crime he did not commit, and he wanted very much to escape. When a friend smuggled in a prayer mat , he was disappointed . He would have preferred a hacksaw or a knife. However, as he knelt in prayer and looked at the intricate patterns of the mat he saw the design for picking the lock in his cell!

Nasruddin was teaching that looking is the key to finding out about life. And the Muslim story tells us that we don’t have to look far to find reality and solutions to our problems—it is just under our nose.

As we navigate life (individually and collectively) we need to look—and not very far from where we are. Additionally, nobody can do it for us—we are solely responsible for our understanding and knowledge. This is the way of our ancestors and the great minds of old who looked and asked questions.

Here some questions that Ugandans need to ask to find answers to their myriads challenges:

1. Why has Uganda been having dictators since soon after Independence?
2. Can there be a solution to the continuing autocratic governance?
3. Why are there ritual murders in Buganda, the center westernized enlightenment in Uganda?
4. Why was Obote toppled twice?
5. Why did the Lutwa government crumble like a house of cards?
6. Why is Buganda the linchpin of successive governments and yet has not produced any charismatic inspirational national leader in spite of its relative wealth and western education?
7. Can westerners buck the culture of guilt-by-association and ward off revenge that might lurk in the dark minds of some Ugandans? Every other groups have been victimised. Will they be the exception?
8. Why have the Acoli suffered for over 20 years?
9. What is the real story behind the LRA and its phenomena ?
10. How does a supposedly Christian nation come up with an Amin, is corrupted from top to bottom, and is soaked with blood in its history?

The answers to the questions are right under our noses, if we can only look. For example, the Karamojong need to look at themselves and their actions if they are to come with any lasting solution to their challenges. The Munyankole woman is just looking for the interests of her husband, and she is not going to take them to the Promised Land.

God Works in Mysterious Ways

Bringing God into politics is a dicey complicated affair since God herself works in mysterious ways not unlike the political realm. So, I am flabbergasted and scratch my head (and I suspect many are) when the first lady of Uganda attributes or calls upon God for her political fortunes. This is in a milieu where her husband (by his own statement) is a representative of God in Uganda. Who is kidding who? Are we that gullible?

Recently Mrs. Janet Museveni was appointed as an assistant minister for Karamoja affairs. She quickly announced that it was God who gave her the daunting job—a job that defeated the British power, was not completed in Obote I, and her husband’s NRA exploited.

Is the Karamoja appointment an attempt by the national representative of God to lock in the monolithic Karamoja votes come 2011? In the meantime maybe her friends from America can flock in to dress the Karamojong and stop the slicing of women’s clitoris. If successful, the efforts will be major historical achievements.

She has asked the Karamojong to pray for rain. For the rain to materialize the Karamojong can aid their prayers by stopping stealing cattle and murdering their neighbors with the NRA guns supplied to them in the days of strategic containment of neighbors unsympathetic to the excesses of the early NRA. The Bible says that, for your prayers to be answered, you have to settle with your brother first—extinguish the bad karma unless, of course, you have a powerful spouse who is beyond the grasp of karma—so he thinks. The Lord, indeed, works in mysterious ways.